A Smooth Clearing to Limb Deforestation


For those of you who have read a few of the previous blogs (Vicki’s Vacation Panic Station and Life is a Circus – Period) you will know I’ve recently been on my first family holiday. Not only were the swimwear dramas a challenge in themselves but these leggy-pegs of mine hadn’t seen the light of day for what felt like a millennia! A deforestation project was going to have to happen …. And PRONTO!

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I’ve only lived in my current home for a couple of years so don’t have a wealth of knowledge when it comes to the best beauticians locally. Before we moved here, my beautiful best friend used to oblige in the long and tedious task of completing my waxing. However, the closest I let her get to waxing my legs though, were just two strips before I cried and begged for her to just pass me a razor! She has since buggered off to Australia which has meant my once smooth and sleek pins (or more like trunks actually) have succumbed to the life of a working mum, too tired to care!… I actually make more effort these days for my annual smear than I do for the love of my life….. Poor fella!!

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I started the preparations by heading to get my eyebrows threaded. ‘Start small, Vics’, I told myself. Expecting that the minuscule amount of hair on my eyebrows would cause no more than a minor wince. Oh how wrong can one person be!!? I’m not sure if I’d upset this lady in a previous life or if she had just had a bad day but for some reason she decided to take it upon herself to make me her b1tch for 10 minutes! When pulling these eyebrows from my limited brow, it felt as though she was dragging them from my behind! I’ve never felt eyebrow pain like it!!! I left her chair with mascara pouring down my face, eyebrows throbbing and glowing red like a beacon but nonetheless, they were looking BEAUTS! After the drama I told my friend all about it who then suggested a local beautician who also came to your house to do the treatments! With a child in bed and a husband working nights, this was perfect for me and I called her straight away. The holiday deforestation for a smooth skinned body was my focus and this was the lady for the job!

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The date arrived for Leanne to come over and I was nervous incase I sobbed like a baby in front of her! It’s been a while, after all! Leanne arrived and set up asking me to hop onto the bed. For anyone unfamiliar with the art of waxing, it means wearing very little clothing! This body of mine has seen better days so it wasn’t exactly my idea of fun but I gritted my teeth, whipped off my trousers and about as gracefully as a walrus trying to pirouette through a china shop, clambered onto the waiting beauty couch!

And so, it began!

A quick sprinkle of talc and before I could say ‘Bob’s your Uncle’ the wax was going on! Thin coats applied to my shin with an oversized ice lolly stick and the very lovely Leanne chatting and smiling at me in the process. I hoped she couldn’t see the anxious trepidation on my face! The wax going on wasn’t a problem. It was really quite nice in fact, but the ripping off……that’s a whole different story! The wax was on, Leanne applied a piece of perfectly shaped material on my shin, gave it a quick rub then…. WHOOOPAAAAHHH…. It was OFF! And then like watching a lap at Silverstone (but far less fun – and I hate car racing), one straight after another – WHOOOPAAAAHHH, WHOOOPAAAAHHH, WHOOOPAAAAHHH! Suddenly my furry trunks had an area of clearing! A beautiful, smooth and shiny area of clearing! This little patch was ready to hit the beach!! Leanne continued to plough through the challenge she was faced with….. And something else impressive happened…. I made it through!!! Through gritted teeth and stifled whimpers, my legs had been completed! They shone in the dimly lit light of my lounge like the sun glistens off the ocean at sunset! I had legs as smooth as silk and I could NOT stop stroking myself! (My legs, that is!!) After my pedi, I waved goodbye to the lovely Leanne and sat in awe looking at the skin on my leggy pegs! I wasn’t sure when I had last seen them looking so, well, delightful! It may not have been enjoyable, but it was bearable and I’ll be making more effort from now on! No more quick ‘once overs’ with the razor in the shower – I am a smoothy convert and that reminds me – I must cancel razors from my next Lifetree World order!!!

Lots of love,

Vicki (and my silky smooth legs) XxxxxX


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